The Shift – Lisa Lennon
*There is a seeming shift that happens when a contraction that believes itself to be a somebody, drops away. Everything that I am going to say about it is going to sound contradictory because when speaking in the story happens, the contradiction is that it never happened.*
*There appears to be a moment when the feeling of being a someone seems to drop. This is not an intellectual happening, it's like a release from the prison of going from a contracted sense of being a me to it being seen that it's always, this. There seems to be a period or process of leading up to that time that can be really, really painful for the me.*
*What happens is there can suddenly be just what is, (this vast nothing) and then the feeling of losing it and becoming contracted again seems to happen*. What seems to happen is, when the contracted sense of self comes back, there's then a looking for this again. What's seen is that sense of having to look for it again was only what was happening in this; it's just a happening.
It can be so energetically strong yet it can't be looked for because it is no thing. Nothing here knows that. *Nothing here knows that there was a me that died. It's an apparent collapse of a feeling of being somebody. It's like having a hood on, and it's taken off.* Sometimes experiences can go with that.
Here, there was a very strong experience that I didn't know if I was actually alive. I thought I was in some sort of dead limbo land. It was very strong. I'm calling it energetic because it's not like an understanding, it's not understood because there isn't anything to understand.
*There is no me that knows it's dropped. There is no me that knows it's died. There isn't anything here that can know that it's died. It's simply a shift from the feeling of being me to what is. Just this.*
It's here before there is any knowing of it. Knowing, is just a happening. The shift does not really take place, it's an appearance of it taking place because nothing knows it.
There is a seeming process of there being a me and then not a me. That to-ing and fro-ing between me and this can go on but that too can be seen that it's just a happening. Then, it apparently drops away, which can happen in many ways; it can be cool and it can also be quite dramatic. *There are no rules to this because it isn't a process. It either happens or it doesn't.*
*There's nothing that can get anyone to this because there isn't anybody.* *There isn't anyone here that can know that anyone's died. It's very clear that there wasn't anyone really there. It's just what it is. This, is all there is. That's what's left and no one knows it. There was never anyone to know it.*
Even this quote from the bible speaks of this, interesting! Amos 8:12. And they shall wander from sea to sea, and from the north even to the east, they shall run to and fro to seek the word of the LORD, and shall not find [it].